A New Normal

In my mind there is this image of perfection.  In my mind, I live in a world where I get up early every morning to have a nice cup of coffee and talk with my Jesus.  In my perfect world, I make breakfast for myself and my husband and enjoy a bit of cuddling before I go to work.  In my perfect world, my house is spotless, my husband or somebody else does my dishes, and I never have to worry about missing a payment.  It doesn’t seem like such an outlandish idea.  It seems possible in theory, but, then, why isn’t it that way?

I can justify myself all day long and make excuses, but it comes down to me. My bad habits have reached the point that I feel like I don’t know how to make a change.  I don’t know how to say no to anything. I have no will power.  I don’t think it will ever get easier.  So, I gotta make a change.  I need to start small and quit trying to make the changes all at once.  Someday I will be super heroes like my parents.  I will keep up the house and cook well like my Mom.  I will have the will power and strength to just do what needs to be done, like both my parents. My father works harder than anyone I know.  I have such wonderful examples and it is time I start following them.  Perhaps these are lessons of just growing up.  Perhaps life is just smacking me in the face and I need to just learn to embrace the new normal… adulthood.

Today I am just feeling down about life.  Today will pass.  Meanwhile, there is a pile of dishes to be done again (never ends) and laundry to gather (always is) and a change that needs to begin.

P.S.  If you regularly read my blogs, please follow it by email.  I would love to get into book reviews eventually and thus need followers.  FOLLOW!!


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